Does everyone attach theme songs to memories?

I'm on Spring Break which means I quickly slip into my natural sleep cycle. Sleep about midnight. Wake about 8:30-9:00. It's lovely. Trey and I always go to bed at the same time, so on these nights I usually read or pick a podcast to listen to while I relax until about midnight while he sleeps. Last night, for some reason, a song popped into my head and I remembered the connection I had to it. So I grabbed my phone and started a list of songs that come with vivid memories. It was quickly a long list! I forgot about it until tonight's Grand Ole Opry 100 year celebration came on after Wheel of Fortune (have I mentioned that I am elderly?). 

Anyway, whilst I serenade the incredibly lucky Trey Hickman along with all the songs on this Grand Ole Opry special, I shall document the songs I listed last night and their significance. Because things like this should be written down.

"I Just Called to Say I Love You" by Stevie Wonder - For most of my childhood, or at least the parts I remember best, my mom worked nights as a telephone operator. She would get us ready for bed and go to work, then be there to wake us up in the morning to get us off to school, sleep while we were at school, and be awake when we got home. This song always reminds me of her because when it came out she would get prank calls of kids calling the operator and singing "I just called to say I love you." Kid me thought it was hysterical. Now it reminds me of having an involved, always-there mom who worked full time. She's like a superhero, y'all.

"The Cowboy Rides Away" by George Strait - My dad has always said we should play this at his funeral and I'm sure we will. When he was diagnosed with pulmonary fibrosis two years ago, I couldn't stop listening to this song and pre-grieving. They told him this could take his life in two years. Here we are, two years later, and he still onery and busy as ever, even if he tires out a bit sometimes. This song will always be Dad's song.

"Sand in My Boots" by Morgan Wallen - Trey and I went to Cabo during the tail-end of COVID. We took a boat tour out to find whales, and we were the only ones on the tour because...well... COVID. The captain let me pick the music. Sand in My Boots played while we saw whales and more whales and their babies, breeching. It felt like we could touch them because we were so close. This song will always take me back to that moment. 

"Victory in Jesus" Hymn - When Walter Stice led the singing at Calvary Baptist Church in Midlothian, Texas, you could be sure we would sing this song. It's Walter's song. (PS - if you're not sure, then ask a Baptist what it means to lead the singing.)

"Gin and Juice" by Snoop - Kasey Patterson had a black Eagle Talon my junior year of high school. We cruised 7th in Corsicana with this song on repeat. 

"Redneck Girl" by the Bellamy Brothers - When this played at our wedding reception, my Uncle Mark slapped Trey on the back and said, "You sure got you a redneck girl now!" This comment and song now live in infamy.

"Red Dirt Road" by Brooks and Dunn - This is Tucker's song (whether he knows it or not). When he was a baby I would dance in the living room with him while this song played on repeat. At that time I think I had a little post-partum depression and my thyroid quit on me. I remember singing that song and promising my sweet baby that even though he would grow up as a city boy I would make sure he knew what it was like to grow up like I did. He loves his Greeson family and cousins, and I love that he is comfortable in both worlds - the city and the country. 

"Sweet Baby James" by James Taylor - This is my Keaton's song. His middle name is James. He was born two weeks after my brother-in-law died. I always say that Keaton brought joy back into our family at a time of immense sadness and uncertainty. I also worried that was a lot of pressure for an itty bitty baby. He will always be my Sweet Baby James, and seeing him grow into a kind, strong man is one of the great joys of my life. 

"Drops of Jupiter" by Train - Yearbook lab. Specifically the years that Sterling Knapp was on my yearbook staff, but this song always makes me think of that lab and those great kids. I keep up with many of them on facebook or through their moms. They are now Google geniuses, fighter pilots, dance studio owners, and lots of other great things. This song will forever be the theme to my yearbook years. 

"Seven Spanish Angels" by Ray Charles and Willie Nelson - This is my Papaw's song. We sang it together while he played guitar. I remember being a little thing and realizing what a sad song it was. I think it sparked my love of a good ballad. 

"Freebird" by Lynyrd Skynyrd - This is Wendy's song. It's her song because it's Dad's song, and somehow she inherited it. I never hear without thinking of her laughing and singing at the top of her lungs. 

"Tell it to Jesus" hymn - This song belongs to my Aunt Judy. She must have helped with children's choir or something when I was little. Maybe Sunday School. I remember her teaching us that we shouldn't say things we don't mean or even sing them. That's why songs were so important - we should only sing to the Lord what we really mean. "Tell it to Jesus" has a line that asks "Are you troubled at the thought of dying?" I was a kid. I was really scared of dying. For my entire childhood I would hum that line in church because I didn't want to accidentally say I wasn't scared of dying!  (Sidenote: this rule about not singing it unless you really mean it apparently did not apply to Conway Twitty songs for me.)

"This Kiss" by Faith Hill - This song was popular when Trey and I first started dating. It makes me smile every time I hear it because it makes me feel all goofy young-love-ish. Just like I still do. ;)

"Somewhere in the World" by Wayne Watson - Donna Myrick and Jerry House sang this at our wedding as our parents entered. It's a holy reminder about my wedding and marriage and our families. This is not a song I hear randomly anymore, but if it ever comes to mind it might bring a tear. 

Keith Whitley, any songs - When my friend Britina moved away from College Station, the rest of our crew went to her house to help her pack. We had boxes everywhere, peach sangria, the Keith Whitley station on Pandora, and equal parts laughter and tears. Keith Whitley will always equal best friends. 

I'm sure there are a million more. I'm curious. Does everyone attach theme songs to memories? 

High Waisted Jeans and Other Evil Things

I am weird about clothes. Shocking, right? I seem so normal. 

If I had to describe my personal style I would use words like "flowy" and "floral." Maybe a little "bohemian" (but the Target version rather than the Anthropologie/Free People version because I am both too old and too cheap for those). 

But these are lies. My style is actually shorts, t-shirts, and flip flops. All the time. Maybe a very soft sweatshirt if it's cold.

(Sidebar: Who talks about their "style"? I suddenly feel very awkward like I take myself too seriously. I assure you, I do not.)

Anyway.

After 24 plus years of marriage, I've realized I have rules for my clothing because my husband so kindly points them out, sometimes while laughing at me. It's okay, I forgive him.

Rule #1, The Cardinal Rule, The Rule Above All Rules: I do not like clothes that touch me. 

This includes things like elastic around the sleeves (unless it's very loose), shirts with collars and buttons that lay heavily upon my chest as if to suffocate me, shirts or pants that attempt to cut me in half when I sit down, socks that leave marks, etc. 

I also cannot wear clothes that itch, scratch, are unsoft, or bunch up around my joints when I move. I really want to be a person who wears blazers, but if I wear one I can't concentrate because every time I bend my arm there is a mound of bunched fabric inside my elbow that makes me want to scream. 

The very first thing I do when I get clothes is to remove every single tag. I used to get in trouble because I would cut holes in my clothes when removing the tags, but as an adult I have become skilled at using a seam ripper, so no more holes. 

My mom must have loved me being her first daughter. I think I can directly identify the moment she gave up making me a cute little girly girl. It was first grade. She forced me to wear a stiff, itchy Holly Hobbie dress for school picture day, and I almost died. I'm still traumatized. It took me six years of fit-throwing, but I never again remember her making me wear something like that. 

I mean, look at this little girl. Doesn't that dress just make you want to scratch all over? I'm pretty sure that crooked smile means "save me!" I think the fabric was something like 70s couch cushion material. It's a wonder I'm so well adjusted today. 

As a job-having adult, the only reason I have clothes that are even close to nice is because of Stitch Fix. Every three months some clothes arrive in the mail, I try them on, and I almost always keep them. The folks over there have gotten good at sending me "flowy" clothes, and I have a profile completed that basically details my clothing phobias in as normal a way as possible. I mostly hate shopping (do you know how many tags are on clothes while they are in the store?!?!?), so this works for me. 

On Friday I got a Stitch Fix and it included...wait for it...high waisted jeans. 

I have long been an outspoken critic of high waisted jeans. I'm sure they look fine on other people, but they do not work on my body. However, I'm an open-minded person, and these jeans were so, so, so cute!  I want to be cute! I also know that at my ripe old age of 47.95 years old I'm supposed to love high waisted jeans because they tuck in and smooth out the part of my belly that refuses to forget the 18 months when I grew children there. 

So I thought positive thoughts and tried them on. 

Y'all. It was not good. 

My sweet husband, ever supportive, said "Those are nice." The look I gave him caused him to follow up with, "Are they touching you too much?" He knows me well. I tried to explain all of the problems with these incredibly cute high-waisted jeans, and I just do not think he understood me at all. I'm sure he was listening intently to the details of my assessment, but he looked almost disinterested!  Can you believe it?

I really needed to make my point, so I sat down on the couch and pulled those jeans up as high as they would go, proving that high waisted jeans are basically a combo of peri-menopausal maternity pants and an unsupportive boob shelf when I sit down in them. Let's just say that was not attractive. It sure got his attention, though, because he finally agreed that those cute jeans were from the devil and I should never, never put them on again. 

Luckily, my Stitch Fix also came with two flowy, floral tops. The high waisted jeans and adorable pink blazer, however, are headed straight for the return mail. It's like this person I've never met who is picking out all my clothes barely knows me at all. 

If you need me, I'll be over here with my seam ripper making sure no tags remain in my two new flowy blouses.

Which is perfectly normal. 

I have something to say about vouchers...

Dr. Stormy Gale Greeson Hickman III has something to say about vouchers.

First, I know and love people who have chosen private or homeschool for their children. Having an opinion about vouchers is not the same as being anti-homeschool or anti-private school.

Second, our state government has correctly used the term “school choice” to push vouchers. Unfortunately, I think many people have interpreted this to mean “parent choice.” It’s not. A non-public school can say “no” to enrolling your kid even if you choose the school. It’s likely one reason that some people choose private schools – they want to know more about/control the students surrounding their own. (AKA - public schools even take the "bad" kids. I know because they are some of my favorites.) School choice is not parent choice. Please be clear about this.

In my schools – ALL of the schools I’ve worked in for almost 22 years – we’ll take your kid and love and educate them. If they are medically fragile, gifted, dyslexic, hate school, love school, whatever. Bring them to my schools and we will take care of them. That’s why we’re funded by taxes – to educate everyone.

This gets me to school taxes. You do not pay school taxes just to send your kids to school. If this were true, only those people with school-aged children would pay school taxes. The purpose of this expenditure is to have an educated populace. An educated populace has less poverty, lower crime, and a million other benefits. That’s what your school taxes are for.

Now, vouchers or school choice or parent choice or what-have-you are about to be a reality in Texas. It’s a forgone conclusion at this point, and no amount of fist-shaking is going to stop it. What we can advocate for is that ALL schools that receive taxpayer money be held to the same standard. The same testing. The same admittance policies. To provide the same services. If a private school then decides to participate in this voucher program, we can be sure they are also participating in the greater good of creating an educated populace rather than picking and choosing who is the best fit for their educational model.

Public schools aren’t perfect. I’ll never claim they are. But neither are private schools, churches, governments, banks, day cares, grocery stores, or anything else. Burning down the entire system because of a few bad characters is just poor judgement. Schools should be well-funded and well-supported so that we can ensure ALL students have an opportunity for a bright future, regardless of the situations they are born into.

The end.

These Children are Testing Me, Part Two

 This one is "Oldest Child Edition."

I was talking to Tucker as I drove home from work on Tuesday (I think), and he mentioned that if the Vikings playoff game gets moved to Phoenix he will probably have to go because everything will be cheaper due to the change. "Why would it get moved?" I asked. Then I learned that they are scheduled to play in LA and may have to be moved due to the wildfires. 

"Well. Use your judgement, I guess," was my response, and we moved on.

Wrong answer. 

Note here that Tucker has been a Vikings fan since the beginning of time. I know he loved Adam Thielen, and it seems like there was a Vikings player before that who was also a favorite. The College Station, Texas, kid has been a Vikings fan for life. 

Fast forward to Wednesday night when we start getting text alerts that our credit card has been used. A flight. A hotel room. Then we get a phone call.

"Hey. I booked the trip to Phoenix on your credit card. Just tell Dad to take the money out of my savings."

Ummmm...what?

So many questions. Do you have a ticket to the game? (no - they go sale tomorrow) When will you leave? (Monday) When will you get back? (Tuesday) Is anyone going with you? (no) When do classes start? (Tuesday)

Yall. This takes sports-obsessed to a new level. An even higher level than when he got in the car and drove to Omaha and back TWICE last year to see the Aggies in the College World Series. This isn't even the Aggies, for goodness sake!

On Thursday he scored his first ever NFL Playoff game ticket for about $140, and it's on the first deck. 

Then yesterday on my drive home he calls me. "Mom, I need to tell you something that is going to stress you out but I've already worked it out."

This immediately stresses me out.

Turns out the cheapest way to pull off this little 24 hour football trip was to leave from one airport in Houston and return to the OTHER airport in Houston. No worries, though, because he's already got a plan for a cousin to handle the airport transport situations. 

Here's his plan:

Leave Houston around 10:00 a.m. Monday, fly Frontier Airlines to Denver where he'll have a layover and then arrive in Phoenix at 3:45. Uber to the stadium with a stop at the hotel so he can drop off his carry-on bag. Game starts at six. 

After the game, find a bar nearby to hangout until the traffic clears out. Uber back to the hotel. Leave the hotel at 4:00 a.m. for a flight home (to the other airport in Houston) with another layover in Denver - this one only 45 minutes. 

Not to worry, though!  He's already called the hotel to make sure he has a super late check-in and verified that the Cardinals stadium has the seventh cheapest beer of any NFL stadium.

Goodness. 

This is him. My child. Traveling alone to a foreign land.

I take deep breaths. Remind myself he's a resourceful kid. Start word-vomiting to Trey all the things that could go wrong. Trey then reminds me, "We wanted them to believe they can do anything. And if we taught them anything it's how to travel." And he's right again. 

I have given specific instructions: Keep your phone charged so I can track you at all times. Avoid white vans. Don't drink too much because you will be robbed and kidnapped and left in the gutter. 

Today he mentioned he needed to email his professors to let them know he would be missing the first day of class. "What are you going to tell them?" I asked.

"That I had the chance of a lifetime at the last minute to see a Vikings playoff game and will be missing the first day of class. I'm not going to lie." 

So there's that, I guess. 

I'm telling you, these children are testing me.

Now I suppose I'll just pray that the flights are on time, that the people he makes friends with along the way appreciate his Vikings-obsession and are kind to him, and dear Lord please let the Vikings win because if they lose we will be talking about the money he spent for years to come. 

If you know anyone in Phoenix or anyone who loves the Vikings enough to be at this game, tell them to keep an eye out for Tuck. 

 

These Children are Testing Me, Part One

Back when this blog started 16 years ago, I often referred to myself as the Mediocre Mommy. Mostly because I was doing my best but also raising children, which is hard. It was to remind myself that mediocre days are just fine if the kids are still alive. 

When the boys were teenagers, I mostly stopped sharing stories because it seemed like being a teenager is hard enough without your mom putting your business out in the world. Now that they are mostly grown, I feel the need to document a story or two now and then. You know, for my future grandkids.

Trey and I talked often about how we wanted to raise our kids. We knew we wouldn't be perfect, so we made sure to work hardest on the things that mattered most. We want them to be adults with faith, to take care of each other, to be good to people - especially those who need it most, and to understand they are capable of anything they set their minds to. 

These days we know we have good boys. Not perfect, but they mostly do most of the things we talked about. I'm not sure you can ask for more from young men at 19 and 21, so I'll not only take it but be incredibly proud. 

But friends, in the last week I have been challenged! 

Let's start with my itty bitty baby boy I grew in my belly and experienced all of my motherhood "lasts" with. Since he was about 15 he's talked about the tattoos he would get. My rule (maybe prayer, hope, desperate beg) is that there are no tattoos on his hands, face, or neck. What kind of mother tells her 15 year old where he can and can't get tattoos? Mediocre ones, I suppose!  I knew it would happen, so I just tried to put my influence in a place that had some hope of working.

On his 18th birthday we took him and his friends out to dinner, and after we left he texted to tell us he was on his way to get his first tattoo and he didn't want to keep it from us so he just figured he'd tell us. It's on his chest and a scripture, so I was supposed to like it. 

And I was so cool about it. I mean, SO COOL. He followed the rules. 

Then about a year ago he came home with a rose on his thigh. I found out later that his cousin got a matching one, and the rose is the flower for the month of June - birth month for him, his cousin, and my dad. That's kind of sweet, I guess. Again, I was cool. 

Along the way he has mentioned a sleeve tattoo. I tried not to comment on this too much because I knew my objections would just make it more likely and, also, he's grown. I reminded him of the rules. I figured a sleeve tattoo seemed painful and expensive and took a lot of time, so I hedged my bets and kept my mouth shut.

As a sidenote, sleeve tattoos or tattoos in general don't bother me at all. Seriously, you do you. I care not. I feel like it's not even a thing anymore, and if you want to express yourself in that way it can even be kind of awesome. 

But this is my sweet baby boy!

(read that sentence again in a despairing mom voice)

This kid started off 2025 by taking a day off of work to start his sleeve tattoo. A kid who wouldn't take a day off work unless he was legit unable to get out of bed, who doesn't like to take vacation, who works kind of compulsively. 

And that night he came over to show us. And sure enough, the kid is tatted up. On his arm. All of it. 

Yall. This sweet baby child has a sleeve tattoo. 

And I'm trying to be cool. I really don't mind it, but it's my sweet baby child!  Did I say that already? Goodness.

I'm sure I'll get used to it. The tiny sobs I feel inside are probably about something else.

Three notes about this. 

1) Tucker and Keaton are currently roommates. Keaton pays the electric bill. It's been freezing all week and we just learned that Keaton won't let Tucker turn on the heater. He may have a fancy new tattoo, but the kid is a cheap grandpa way down on the inside. 

2) As Trey and I talked about this, he reminded me of the things that we always said were important to us when raising the boys. Being tattoo-free isn't relevant to even one of them, and he followed the rules. He is so right. 

3) While I didn't exactly hope for this, people better not even think about saying anything bad about my awesome tatted up electrician kiddo. I will cut you. 

My sweet baby child is still just as sweet. Just a little more decorated. :)